But...

When I was a student in Belgrade, there was a street artist who signed all of her pieces TKV. It was always a small treasure, finding a new wall graced with her work. One of her pieces which stayed with me was titled "unconditional love"

In 2010, when the photo was taken, I'm not sure I quite understood what it was that she was opening for public conversation--perhaps because I have been incredibly fortunate to have grown up with parents who unconditionally loved--and saw no need to label it as such.

and I'm realizing that the crux of this idea of unconditional love, to me, has to do with eliminating this pesky little word from my vocabulary of love: but.

But.

all it does is make trouble.

because with this little word we can unravel a sentence of heartfelt caring, hide our true feelings, or perhaps just our real concerns behind our professed unending love, confusing what I hope is the true message: love, with the details, the 'but's. and not have to acknowledge that--at least for me--unconditional love (if it is indeed unconditional) has to take the upper hand over any 'but' statement. of course, growth, self reflection and criticism all are a part of love--is it not a dynamic feeling? but I'm learning, perhaps  'but' is not the best route to broach those topics.

It certainly is a challenge: I use 'but' all the time to describe my love-frustration relationship with my high school students.
but I guess, this is what the second semester is for.